Life-insurance and losing teeth
by Zipzapperdoodles
Summary: Jane and Maura, and a night out... - The song is from KD Lang "Outside Myself"... One shot.


One thing a badass like Detective Rizzoli doesn't like is when some asshole is hitting on her Maura. It's not that she thinks she owns her wife, but let's be honest here: What's her's is and she likes to keep it that way and is very clear about her rights of ownership.

So if some asshole from the bearded fraction thinks he can come after her Maura, he has to be prepared for the thunderstorm that's gonna hit him! I recall last week...

A nice quiet evening at a local bar, soft and sensual music, Maura in a mouthwatering delicious looking red dress with dito high heels...

"Oh, there is Peter, you know that lawyer from last week? Do you mind if I have a little chat with him, I'll be right back. Jane said as she put her glass of red moon on the table she and her wife Maura were seated at.

"Of course, Jane. But don't stay too long, last time I could read my Medical Journal, fore- and backwards, as long as it took you to return!" Maura said sweetly with a proud smile on her face.

"You think you're funny, huh?" Jane told her, "Smart and funny..."

"I do indeed. And it's true, every time you have your talking-with-moments, I'm ending up alone for at least an hour!" Maura complained.

"Not this time, baby. I'll be back before you even can say 'cookawoockawham'!"

"That's not even a word, Jane!"

"Well, it doesn't need to be one, it's a matter of speaking, baby. It means I'll be back in no time!"

"'No time' is already over the moment the words left your mouth, Jane!" Maura countered and her eyes gleamed of fun.

"You have your clowns day today, baby and such a good back-counters too. I'm really proud of you." Jane said,"So it's okay then?"

"Of course, love. You go and talk to that boring lawyer, while your funny and sexy wife sits alone, all bored and ready to be hitten on!" Maura looked even more gleaming as she already did, at Jane.

"Don't make fun about those hormone controlled bastards, that's not funny, Maura. You know how I feel when someone's hitting on what's mine!"

"Yours, Jane!? Maura said ...

"Hey, you know what I mean, Maur'..."

"Well, yeah. But you of all people should know if someone owns someone it's that I own you. Pussy-flipped and all!"

"It's pussy-whipped, and yes I know, my sexy mistress. I know my place!"

"You are mocking me, Jane!"

"No, I'm deadly serious here, sweety pie... I'm yours to have to hold, and to do dirty things with!"

"Jane!" Maura said, "You are unbelievable."

"Yeah, I know!" Jane said and looked proudly at the love of her life.

"You know exactly what I mean, Jane. You seem to think 24 hours a day of sex."

"Well, have you seen yourself, baby. Damn! Mouthwatering, sexy, gorgeous...and those boobs...". Jane closed her eyes for a moment, "Yummmmmmm..."

"Oh yes, You are always ogling my boobs, even in the most impossible places and times."

"Well they _are_ masterpieces, Maur'! Do you really expect from me to ignore them, when they calling out on me the whole fucking day!?" Jane explained in her most innocent voice.

Jane, you're in-correctable, really! You go to that lawyer and you better be back soon, or my mouthwatering, sexy, gorgeous boobs are going back home with me and you can stay alone at the bar!" Maura said to her wife.

"Okidoki, at your command, mistress!"

All Maura could do was shake her head and say nothing, which she wisely did...

 ** _Some time later..._**

"So that's how an sexy angel fallen from heaven looks like, yum-yum!" a sloppy looking men said loudly to Maura as he shamelessly ogled up and down her body.

Maura cringed a little bit. She looked at the men and didn't say a word. She actually didn't need too, because when the flames that sprouted into the man's direction were real he would be burning into a ashes in no time.

The sloppy looking men, with a clearly badly smelling breath continued his, what he thought was successful, attempt to impress the lady he had set his eyes on, early that evening. _'If it wasn't for that damn butch hovering over that pretty ass, I could be in her pants at this very moment'_ the self-enamored idiot thought to himself.

"Without the right life insurance I would consider twice if you should continue to hit on my woman!" a sudden voice interrupted the train of horny thoughts that the, seemly drunken bad smelling, guy had.

"W-w-what the fuck!" the guy exclaimed loudly as he turned towards a very angry snorting Jane Rizzoli.

Two black coal eyes looked angry at the drunken bastard that hit on her woman. "If you wanna lose your teeth, please go ahead, but I can tell ya' that it ain't a nice place to be in..the emergency room!" Jane made herself big and wide as a peacock as she hovered over the sloppy guy who was cringing by now into a little ball of misery.

"So?" Jane snorted, "What will it be, sir!?"

"Uhhhh.." was all the unfortunate guy could say. He may be a little drunken asshole, but he wasn't that stupid, if he had learned one thing in life was that he better could stay away from angry woman. A butch and angry seemed to double the possibilities of more than a slap in the face! So without any consideration and/or pondering-moments he said loudly, **"Fuck!"** and made a quick jump and a run towards the entrance of the bar.

As Jane made a move to follow the unfortunate bastard outside the bar, her wife Maura ( _bless her_ ) asked the still fuming Detective in a soothing voice "Jane? Come and dance with me? Let him go, he ain't worth your anger, it's you I want..."

Jane looked lovely at her wife, turned her head and gazed with a look of doom in her eyes at her door were her opponent a few seconds ago made his way out and , said softly, "Yeah.."

'Spending any thoughts about that idiot will just spoil my evening with my sexy wife.' Jane thought and followed Maura to dance with her on the little dancefloor in the middle of the bar.

 _A thin ice covers my soul_  
 _My body's frozen and my heart is cold_  
 _And still so much about me is raw_  
 _I search for a place to unthaw_

Maura closed her eyes as she lay in the arms of her beloved Jane. 'So soft my Jane, and so badass at the same time. I love her so much' Maura thought while the soft and strong arms of her wife engulfed her into a world were only they had access.

 _Something in me broods love into fear_  
 _It veils my vision, leaves my thoughts unclear_  
 _And my eyes from blue turn to grey_  
 _Hoping to mask what they say_

"I love you so so much, Maura. You are so much more than a sexy body to me" Jane whispered in her wife's ear.

 _I've been outside myself for so long_  
 _Any feeling I had is close to gone_  
 _I've been outside myself for so long_

"I know my love, I know!" Maura kissed Jane softly on her lips, while they softly danced on their own cloud of love.

 _I have been in a storm of the sun_  
 _Basking, senseless to what I've become_  
 _A fool to worship just light_  
 _When after all, it follows night_

 _I've been outside myself for so long_  
 _Any feeling I had is close to gone_  
 _I've been outside myself for so long_  
 _So long_

 _I've been outside myself for so long_  
 _Any feeling I had is close to gone_  
 _I've been outside myself for so long._

And so both lovers swayed into the night, forgotten was the stupid bastard, forgotten was the world around them and all there was, was just their love for each other...

#fin#


End file.
